Monday, November 29, 2021

I think there is another cause too

There is an article in Time Magazine about how single people today care less about looks. They find a rise in need for commitment, emotional compatibility and a decrease in the power of physical attractiveness.

Now Time credits these changes to Covid and Covid lockdowns that have reshaped what is important, and that is no doubt part of it. But I also think hook-up apps have a lot to do with it.

Here is why I say this. If one uses a hook-up app like Tinder, a ton of people see you and vice versa. Given that you are probably many people's type, it is easy to match with someone you find very physically attractive. And by "match" I mean often have sex with. But you soon learn that beautiful people can also be dicks. Sometimes it seems almost like a prerequisite. 

I don't claim to be cute, but you are someone's perfect type. When I was a bartender, I did "date" some gorgeous men. Like stunning. You learn pretty quickly that stunning is not the panacea that you want it to be.  Much more important is humor, confidence and emotional intelligence. Cute helps a lot, but it isn't the biggest factor. So, I think this progression is surprisingly tied to people having a way to hook up with almost anyone you want to.

You pretty quickly realize you want more.

(PS - I think my husband is as hot as hell, and confident and funny. I hit the jackpot.)


  1. If all you want is a hook-up looks matters. If you want something more meaningful, looks matters less. The older I get the less my own looks matter to me...there's only so much one can do w/o surgery.


Wells Cathedral

 While in England, we visited Wells Cathedral. It is a famous Cathedral in England and was the seat of Catholic Bishops, then the Church of ...